User blog:Ssskoopa/Ssskoopa suffers through Red Alert Online so you don't have to: Prologue

So, Red Alert Online, to the surprise of pretty much nobody, is an absolute train wreck of a game. It's pretty much just a reskinned version of Global Strike, designed to suck money out of your wallet, and nothing more.

And that's why I preordered it:

As a certain Internet critic always says: I remember it, so you don't have to. I'm going to suffer through this horrible excuse of a game, so the readers of this Wiki won't have to. But before I do that, let's take a look at one of the reviewer previews of this game that I found on Bilibili.

Here's the link: https://www.bilibili.com/video/av21963446

Most of it is fairly boring, though. So here are the highlight reels (lowlight reels?): These are apparently the intro cutscenes. Always a good sign when they didn't even bother making their own, and just reused screenshots from Red Alert 2...

Oh, and in case you can't tell, that's Ackerman. Lord knows why they decided to give him photoshop hair. If they wanted a president with hair, why didn't they just use Dugan? Wait... All the other stuff are from Red Alert 2, so why the hell did they use Red Alert 3 Tanya (and a badly photoshopped Ackerman)? Don't tell me they can't even tell the difference.

Also, I'm pretty sure that Jenny McCarthy didn't give them the right to use her likeness... Come to think of it, is this even legal? Oh, and then this happened. *Insert That Escalated Quickly meme here*